I-i-i-i-i-i-i-i Am Everyday People!!
First off, I have to send my prayers to this freshman that goes to my school. Anyone reading this that has a belief in a higher power, please send a prayer up for him. He's only 18 and he just lost both of his parents in a plane crash on Friday. He's a real good kid and I'm praying that he comes out of this tragedy alright.
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Straight Seinfield moment: Me, my girl and our boy Kenny went out to eat on Sunday. Just as our food arrives we see these girls that we know exiting the restaurant. So they make their way to our table and proceed to say hello. After they finish greeting us, my friend (female) reaches over to one of the girl's stomach, says "is this a baby?" and rubs her stomach like she was trying to feel a kick. Turns out the girl was so not pregnant. She looked my girl dead in her eye and said No, I'm just fat." My friend just ended up burying her head on the table and wouldn't come up until the girls had left. Ya'll know we talked about her to no end, right? Just as she was about to cut into her steak, Kenny's ass says "Gosh, I hope that steak wasn't pregnant when they decided to put it on a plate for you!! You'd better feel it's stomach first...!" IgNaNt.
Saw Coach Carter. It's cool. Typical sports movie. Ashanti played herself. Sam Jack is always good. MMmmMmM MmMMm BITCH!! (cookies to you if you get that...)
Mother Nature is a bitch. For real. Not even a regular bitch, like me. No, she is a "my man just left me/I got three kids to take care of/My mama never loved me and my daddy was a pimp" type bitch. On Saturday, I got off work at four in the morning. My girl who works with me dropped me off at my dorm. She pulls up and I start to open the car door. Before I can get it open 2 fuckin inches, the wind blows that sucka shut. We listen for a second and all we hear is a sound reminiscent of a white girl horror scream. I mean it sounded like it was about to be a straight twister out there. So I bundle up and grab the handle again. This time I swing it open like I'm the DEA. So I start my walk to the front of the dorm building with my potential late lunch (which means leftover cheesy bread and chicken from Domino's that I ordered at work) in hand. I'm barely halfway to the door when this fierce ass gust of wind comes and snatches my food straight out of my hand. Shit goes crashing to the ground. It didn't just fall. It fell and popped the fuck open, leaving my chicken and bread all on the cement. Feeling spiteful, I prepare to kick the hell out of my recently emptied box. I pull my foot ALL the way back, said a big "Fuck yo' box, nigga!!" (again, cookies if you get that...) and prepare to kick the hell outta this box. Just as my foot is about to connect, the wind gets to it first and sends it flying a good 3 feet in the air. It was like the wind said "Ha ha bitch, you thought you was gon' get the chance to vent, huh? HELL NAW!! I won't give you the pleasure..." Straight treated me like I was Charlie Brown and she was Lucy. Punk ass Mother Nature.
The Steelers lost. Ha ha! Browns to the Super Bowl in 2007!!!!
posted by Liza Valentino at
2:10 AM
8 Comments:
LMAO @ the whole damn blog. U sound like this chick I used to hang tight with at school. LOL @ imagining u kicking a box in the wind. Mmmmmm, Mmmmmm, Mmmmm, Bitch....LOL.
8:51 AM
I couldn't imagine being 18 and losing my parents. He must be devastated. GOD Bless him.
It is so cold outside it's crazy. I have on 2 pair of socks and my feet still feel like blocks of ice. I'm dying:)
12:43 PM
i'm so sorry to hear that about your friend. I couldnt imagine that happening to me, and i dont think anyone can feel his pain unless they've been int hat situation. I'll pray that God will ease the pain because that has to be a very tragic lost.
As for you and your friends, i almost did that before, sometime last summer. I was walking in downtown Chicago with my bestfriend because we were going to her job and she seen this girl she worked with. Now this girl was little, thin and short, but she had a belly. She looked like she lived a rough life too, had a scar across her neck like she'd been cut and she just looked like she use to, or still does drink and smoke. I was about to ask her if she was pregnant until i thought about when my cousin had a similar situation. So i didnt. I asked my friend after the girl left and she was like "No she isn't pregnant. Her stomach has been like that for the last year since i've knwon here" iw as like "OMG" i was sure glad i didnt ask her that, she probably wouldve cut me. What i didnt understand was that how was she so thin but her stomach looked like she was 5 months pregnant?
As for the incident my cousin seen this lady at church holding a baby and asked her "who's baby is this?". The lady at church said "This is my baby" The baby was like a month old. No one knew that this lady was pregnant because she is SO big. She's not just big, it's just that her stomach is big and it hangs. She didnt look any different. My cousin said she had to turn away and was shocked because this lady was in her choir and she didnt know she was pregnant or even had a baby.
As for the wind, i know about some wind because i'm from Chicago. That windchill factor is a mug. Thank's for stopping by my blog! Sorry for the long post!
5:21 PM
I know how you feel... Toronto is cold like a bitch too. One day, it was about -30 with the wind chill (that's -20 F), and there was freezing rain. I wanted to catch the bus and I needed to cross the street. I stepped on the road and totally flipped on my back. I'm talking about feet flying from beneath me and head hitting the concrete. Everyone on the bus and the street saw this and laughed. I hate damn Canadian winters!
7:55 PM
Mother Nature is on some next stuff! I can't take it!
Too bad about the not-so-pregnant girl. I know her feelings were hurt. I just hope she decided to go and work on that!
9:54 PM
Sorry to hear about the freshman's friend's parents.
This winter has been rather mild here in Germany. I think east coast stole our snow. Hmmm...I wonder how the weather is back home in St. Louis.
5:13 AM
wow I didnt even hear about a plane crash where did this take place at? My prayers are definetly with him. As for your crazy day: Im laughin at ya
11:03 AM
LMAO at your beef with mother nature! Mmmmmm Mmmmm Bitch is one of the funniest skits on that dog gone show! *yelling* "YOU AIN'T NEVER SEEN NONE OF MY MOVIES!!!!?????" HA!
P.S. I'll definitely send a prayer up for your friend
11:50 AM
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