Family Business

Before I start on my tangent, let me hit you with some neccessary Background information:
Me and my little cousin used to be tight. I probably treated her more like my little sister than my real sister. She went everywhere with me and anytime she needed anything she came to me. She comes from a fucked up family (check this post, number 8 is her father) and I've always felt the need to protect her. All the females in her family are the "gimme my welfare so I can sit on my ass" type. She looked at that and knew she wanted better. She's smart as hell and never got caught up in the mess where she lived. I was so proud of her and had plans to move her in with me my junior year.

Over the summer, she started dating this guy who is 22. At first I started talking yang about how he is too old for her and blase skip. But then I remembered that I was 16 dating a 22 year old and that she is only one year younger than me. Eventually as they continued dating, I started to see that she was changing. She stopped coming to church, stopped being around the family and all her conversations centered around him. We had a couple of talks, she insisted that it was nothing that and that work was occupying her time more than him. I let it go.

A few months ago, I get word through the family grapevine that she is pregnant. I was crushed because:
a) She didn't tell me
b) She barely knows dude
c) It threw a Shaq sized monkey wrench in the plan to get her out
The first person she told was my aunt, who she calls her godmother. I'm still hurt that she didn't come to me, but I understand that she may have been hesitant because she knew I would be let down. So I let that slide. Christmas Day she calls my father, of all people and tells him she's pregnant. I guess this was her official press release and her way of saying it's ok if the whole family knows now. (Please...ya'll know the second she told my aunt EVERYBODY knew!!) Still remaining optimistic, I call and try to get in contact with her. By this time, she's moved in with dude and quit her job. After I finally reach her, she tells me she was scared to tell me and that she called my father because he is the "calmest in the family."

WTF???!!

This is where big ass red lighted alarms go off in my head. My father? Calm? Hell naw...Now, don't get me wrong, my daddy is cool peeps, but that negro is FAR from calm. All anybody who really knows me need to hear is that I got my temper from him and they will understand. My daddy doesn't play. This is the same dude who got into it with me and we both lived under the same house for a year without speaking. Calm? I think not...

So at this point the family is ticked with her. Saying shit like "if she can't tell us herself, she betta not come to us for anything"...I'm the one taking up for her, saying how hard it must be and how I'm sure she didn't mean for this to happen.

Until...

Yesterday I was on the phone with my aunt (her "godmother") who informs me that she hasn't spoken to lil cuz in a while. Somehow we get around to the fact that she is mad at her. I ask why and she says that all the work she put in to making sure my cousin graduated and had somewhere to go afterwards was negated by that shit. I agree, saying that I can see where she is coming from. Then she hits me with the REAL reason. She says "And plus, I can't believe she was stupid enough not to use protection." I say, "Come se dice, huh?" (My phrase for "Say WHAT?!?) She replies that she didn't use any birth control because she "didn't want to get fat." I asked if se used condoms and my auntie said "hell naw."

Silence.

What in the hell makes someone go so damn stupid? She didn't want to get fat. Well, shit. You're pregnant now, dummy. Yo ass is about to swell the hell up!! Great move...

As you might be able to tell, I'm not taking the news too well. I really thought she wanted better for herself, but I guess I never knew her at all.


And that hurts.